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What drives me Nuts!

Seems like 'em in a little frustration right now.
I know I like him, BUT, something stops me.
So here's a little breathing for me to ease out this so-called confusion.
I opened this thing to some of my friends.
Still, I got no answer. It's because I AM the problem.
I don't know what's going on with me.
And, I'm FREAKIN' CONFUSED!
Like I've got some things to do but I'm disturbed.
Once in a while I think, I try to remember things, so maybe it will give me some answer.
Still, I got NOTHING.
I know I may sound crazy(at least for a week), but I don't know. REALLY.
I feel this thing but I actually don't. Got it? No. It's really hard to explain.
I really, really, really feel HAPPY when he's there.
BUT, when he's not, I'm okay.
I'm not used to this kind of thing because I really don't feel this way when I like someone.
Not like before, when I used to like another guy.
It was really difficult to forget that guy.
But, I managed to do it naman.
Probably I'm a little bit scared of the way things might come out.
Of what will actually happen.
And maybe what I really feel.
I got scared that I deny myself to what I was actually feeling.
At first, I was just happy about what's going on.
Then, after months of handling those feelings, I woke up one night.
Then I realized that I had a dream. I saw him there.
Standing in front of me. Then, at my left side was a mirror.
The mirror looked more-likely as a television.
The pain I felt before was shown there.
Then I looked at him. He was smiling at me.
Then I felt this fear. I was afraid. It scared me.
"What if the same thing happens?"

Now, I'm sitting in front of my laptop. Thinking.
Should I decide? Or should I leave things the way they are?
A friend of mine asked me.
"You think he likes you too?"
I answered,
"No. Never."
I think I really have to leave this thing to HIM.
I guess I really need to pray harder so that this freakin' thing won't disturb me anymore.
I know I like him, yet I really don't.
And, if ever he likes me too, I'll just leave it to God.
Whatever happens, I know I got HIM by my side.
Pray for me guys. Help me ease this out.

*

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